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'Exploring the limits of sexual potential has little to do with clever techniques,' says Bettina Arndt, 'but a lot to do with how two people feel about themselves and each other outside the bedroom.' And reading many of the extracts forced me to question plenty of my assumptions.That the twentysomething women are much more sexually confident than past generations, for instance.
These diaries prove, repeatedly, that there is no 'normal'.I even had a radio phone-in show, where the producer and I regularly had hissed, frantic exchanges over what the next caller might be about to reveal and whether it could potentially shut down the station.I've had sackfuls of letters detailing every kind of female sexual worry, demand, hope and confusion.And far from the cosy, all-girls-together whingeing I anticipated-Ooh, men! '), the book charts the deepest, private emotions of both genders - and reveals a hidden world that's truthful, painful and sometimes inspiring.The diaries aren't really about sex at all, but about the emotions that surround sex with someone you love - fear, intimacy, gratitude, guilt, resentment, loneliness, hope.
Writing for women - and talking to them during radio phone-ins and at events - it's often tempting to dismiss their pestering partners as sexually voracious testosterone-driven factories.